Hello internet! I'm going to be honest for a second, I have no idea how to write or keep up a blog. But, here we are!
Over the past few months I have felt kind of “stuck.” And to be honest I’m not sure if that’s even a good way to describe it, but those are the best words I can find right now. I’m sure I’m not alone in this feeling, it feels like beating a dead horse to talk about how rough the past 18ish months have been for everyone so I’m not going to dwell on that. Lately I’ve been thinking about graduating from college during Covid and how my life might have been different had I graduated in normal times. It has taken a while but I have come to terms with it, and am even beginning to be grateful for it, because I feel like I have gained a new perspective that I would not have if life had not been shaken up the way it has.
I have dreamed of owning a bakery since I was somewhere between 5 and 10. Yeah, I was that kid who knew what she wanted to be from a really young age. But that feeling of being stuck and coupled with my experience at CookieCon and some common themes in the podcast I listen to got me thinking. I have come to realize that it is okay for dreams to grow and to evolve, that it's okay to stop and take a breath before diving head first into the next big project.
I recently finished reading Girl Wash Your Face by Rachel Hollis (if you haven't read this yet go do it now) and towards the end I had this weird feeling. Well, maybe a couple feelings. First was just the fire that the book lit inside me. This wasn’t a fire to do anything specific, it was just that feeling you get after hearing someone's story that makes you dream big dreams and feel like you can do anything. But the bigger feeling, and this was a weird one for me, was that I needed to start writing, or journaling or something to track my thoughts because something big was about to change. Now if you know me you know that I am not a writer, I am not a journaler, and I definitely am not someone who likes to track their emotions or feelings to look back on later. But this felt different somehow. This felt like God just whispered in my ear that I needed to do this. That things were about to change for me and I would want to remember all of it.
Well that was a few weeks ago and now here we are, starting a blog. And honestly I didn’t even start right away because I didn’t really feel like things were actually going to change. But that book flipped a little switch somewhere in me. I went from reading mostly fiction (you know, all the New York Times best sellers) and listening to exclusively true crime podcasts to craving more stories like Rachel’s. I have started listening to podcasts from some incredible business minded Christian women. And then a few days ago another switch flipped. I don’t have to rush into all my dreams right now, it’s okay for my 5 year plan for my life to change a bit. Those dreams will be here waiting for me when the right time comes. When I realized that I felt like I had clarity that I haven't had for a while. That maybe being “stuck” was okay, maybe God was holding me back just a tiny bit until I was willing to see things His way and was willing to let go of the control I have been holding onto so tightly for most of my life. That He was waiting for the right time to show me this new dream.
Now when I dream, I dream big, and I dream fast. I get ideas and I want to make them happen ASAP. And while this blog is the first step in my “new” direction I don’t want to get too ahead of myself. Trust me, I want to share them all with you RIGHT NOW. But the reality is that there are still so many things to sort out before I can share these dreams with you. So for now I am just so thankful that you are here, reading these words that have come pouring out of me. And I promise, as soon as I can share more I will.